Not-so-smiling eyes

I was asked yesterday about the performance of someone who does some work for me. In all honesty, her performance is satisfactory. She does what is asked of her and without complaint. Now, I have some folks who do what is asked of them but there is an air of passive-aggressiveness about them. This person doesn't do that. There is no attitude involved.

Other people I work with recognize that we are on the same team, I am there to help and guide, and any findings I have are appreciated. I do my best not to put people (at work) on the defensive.

Unfortunately for yesterday's person, and I'll call her Noelle, she works in a very dynamic environment, with a lot of people people that strive to exceed expectations, and they do it effortlessly. Prior to my current condition, I used to work the same way, and even on my worst days, I am still completely unable to not smile and give more than expected. It is just my nature (again, at work). There are some people out there that condemn this condition as perkiness, or Type A behavior, or neurosis, even, but really, in many instances, I think it's part of the job description.

Life can be hard for some people, I guess, but there is still little excuse to not provide service with a smile. Noelle is just one example. While she is doing her job in a capable fashion, there is just something missing, and the psychiatrists on staff suspect that it is affecting their enrollment numbers. She is just not motivating people to come in to the office. Unfortunately for Noelle, the person that they want to replace her with is just one of those people that draw people to them like a magnet, even if it is just someone calling in over the phone for 15 minutes. But there can be a connectedness that some people don't have. Noelle doesn't have it.

I used to also manage another person like Noelle. Marcy. We had taken to posting happy face signs above all of the phones, to remind Marcy to smile while talking. It made a difference. Enrollment picked up. I used this strategy myself to block the view from my old office window. I'd get a bad vibe or often see unhappy faces whenever I looked in a certain direction, so I posted happy faces on that window. It improved my mood. Of course, I posted them on the back of a political sign, which in hindsight probably illicited more negative expressions from the other side. Oh well. I had my happy faces.

I've heard strangers tell my dad that he looks like a completely different person when he smiles. It's true.

I was just watching Kathy Lee Gifford on The Today Show, and I noticed that she does not seem like one of those magnetic personalities. While she is a competent person, her personality repels people. I have at least one aunt like that. She's just not a happy person and it carries on. It seeps in.

Luckily, Harry has smiling eyes, and I hope he keeps them. It will be important throughout his life. Lief is easier when you smile. People are drawn to you.You can even be a deep, intellectual person and still appear smiling and friendly. It's true!

And so, I will leave you with one example of Harry's positive attitude: When I picked him up at school yesterday (or tried to. He still makes me wait about an hour while he finishes playing) his teachers told me he'd been covered in mud pretty much from head to toe that morning (they did change most of his clothes). They asked him what his mommy and daddy would say when they saw him. His response: I'm so happy to see you!
He's right.