Is it time to go back yet?

This is the first year in forever that we haven't gone somewhere for the winter holidays. Since Kim's not feeling her best lately, and we decided that we'd be better off not driving up & down 95 all week, we hosted.

It all started off with my anti-climactic last day at AT&T on Friday the 21st. My bon voyage lunch was the day before, so Friday was literally a day of signing papers, handing over files that no one really wanted, handshakes, and even a few hugs. Off I went to gather the last few things for the first few days of "vacation."


Saturday began as most do, as a whirlwind. A quick jaunt to Little Gym, coupled with a re-stocking trip to Costco. Home to stop by quickly for Fiona's 1st birthday party, only to get home in time to get cookies going for Kim's annual exchange with friends. We had a nice dinner & fun with the kids.


Sunday was Kim's birthday, and the arrivals began. Meg & Ian in from Seattle for surf & turf (alas, not home-cooked) and some tasty b-day cake. Several beers later, and off to bed to get ready for more.

Saturday was for Shrimpfest... VA-style. Pop-pop Oscar made it in early, as did Pop-pop Goo & Sue. just about ready to kick it into high gear, and we got the call that B, A & PJ were en route... not from Alexandria as expected, but from Drexel Hill. Whatever... food's on the table & house full of hungry guests. Hope there's some left.

Harry was having a blast showing off for everyone (napless no less), and putting all 15 dimples to excellent use. The PA-folks finally arrived and things slowed down a bit, but then the gift-exchanging began. As rookie of the group, Mr. McJames was enlisted as official hander-outer. In inimitable low-country style, he apparently was taking too long, and duties were assumed elsewhere.


Harry was now in rare form. as previously noted, Harry had been relatively disinterested in Xmas past, but this year he was ALL about opening gifts. For him, or anyone else. I made the mistake of asking if his Hat symbol appeared on the ones he wanted to open, hoping to slow him down a bit, but bad idea on my part... now he suddenly had nothing to open. Pop-pop O fixed that, and kept them coming (as did B with the cookies well after bedtime).

Hoping that a wonderful evening was had by all, B A & PJ parted ways soon after, and the Magoos headed back to their hotel to rest up for the big morning. Uncle Ian & I were quickly enlisted to unload Pop-pop O's truck with all of the gear he had from Santa's place. based on the amount he had in tow, you'd never notice that we'd already emptied the room of gifts.

Xmas morning, and we were all up early again thanks to little man. He was on a mission, yet again. Santa had brought along plenty more stuff, by way of Pop-pop's truck. After a big breakfast, the Magoo's continued their trip south, Oscar headed back to NJ, and the rest of us settled in for the "calm" before the next wave. It was somewhere around this time, that Uncle Ian discovered the wii.


Gramma arrived the next morning, with even more gifts for H to open. We were off to lunch with the Drexel Hill gang again, and the accompanied us back to the house afterwards for more interaction. Ian got cracking on the castle assembly. Luckily we took some pictures of it, that we later referenced for re-assembly after it came crashing apart on its voyage upstairs from the basement.


It was somewhere around this point, that the days really began to blur together. Harry really hadn't taken a regular nap in days, had been opening more and more gifts as the week progressed, and got a little more cheeky with each round. His "diet" had been supplemented only by repeated offers of sweets & treats from just about everyone. Bailey had been seriously working the crowd as well, but with much less success.

As Kim, Meg & Gramma headed out for some pampering on Thursday, Harry finally went down for a significant nap, and Ian & I had it out on the golf course. After they returned, we did our best with a sans-Cilantro mean from Baja Fresh (is that even possible?) before the McJames' headed out.

Friday turned into a day to try to rehab Bailey. Harry wanted to take her to the dog park, and we did. Unfortunately, she got literally left out in the cold at lunchtime, but no dogs allowed in Johnny Rockets.


Adding insult to injury, I left the doggie bags on the roof of the Forrester, and we lost one before I could get the remainder off, about halfway home.

Saturday lead off with a hearty breakfast, and a trip to the school bus park, and then onto the airport to see Gramma off. In our own effort to return to normalcy, a lunchtime trip to Generous George's for some positive pizza was in order. As luck would have it, bumped into some old friends who let us in on the train display at the National Botanical Gardens.

So Sunday saw a trip downtown to check out the trains. In the past, we've rushed down to locations such as Union Station for highly touted layouts, but this exceeded all expectations by far. Having watched Polar Express more times than any of us would care to admit over the last few weeks, it was very well received by the little man.


Today afforded us a trip to the pool of all places. Harry remains a serious little waterbug, although apparently not as much as I'd thought, as the one time I turned my back, he quickly sunk to the bottom (in about 3 feet of water)... luckily Kim was watching.

Back home, and several more minor tantrums later, and here Kim and I are struggling to stay awake for the big ball drop. We "enjoyed" a screening of the original "Planet of the Apes" with ol' Chas Heston... don't ask me why, but cable programming absolutely stinks lately. 30 more minutes, and we'll be there.

Hope everyone who visited enjoyed their stay, but may I be among the first to offer, is it time to go back to work yet? Can Harry go back to school yet? Can we all get back on schedule yet?

one more day...

Things Harry has said this week:

Mommy: That's a nice puzzle Miss Menike gave you. It has a lot of pieces.

Harry: Yeah. Maybe you and daddy can help me with it!

Harry: Will you stay and eat dinner with me?

All of the words to Santa Claus is Coming to Town

Our reigning Christmas expert...

It seems Harry is the king of all things Christmas. The other day Harry came home with reindeer food. Kind of cute. We'll sprinkle it on the lawn on December 24. Yesterday it was a tree ornament, which was a picture of himself in a cute little frame. Okay, we have a tree. Good thing. Harry hung it on the tree, and then commented matter-of-factly, "I love Santa." Later, in the tub, we sang half an hour's worth of holiday carols, including the cheekier version of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
I knew when Harry started school he'd be exposed to many new things, Christmas included. I just didn't realize he'd embrace it so much. At least he's not talking about "The Baby Cheezits" like some of his friends.

If one more person tells me Harry is deprived....

Okay, maybe it is mostly people from New Jersey telling me that we are depriving Harry of his happiness, chance to be a kid, whatever...If I hear it again I am going to start revoking their EZ Passes!

Let me say right now that Harry's happiness is my number 1 priority, and the child is anything but deprived. Feel free to ask him. He is smart and level headed and wise beyond his years, and he will answer whatever question you pose to him. And he is happy. His teachers at school tell me regularly "Harry is always happy!"

• Having a big house in the suburbs does not result in a happy childhood.
• Having a Christmas tree does not result in a happy childhood.
• Having a Christmas tree large enough to put toys under does not result in a happy childhood.
• Having more toys than you can play with does not result in a happy childhood.
• Staying home all day with Mommy does not result in a happy childhood.
• Having Mommy cook and Daddy work does not result in a happy childhood.
• Playing with gender stereotyped toys does not result in a happy childhood.
• Staying up all hours of the night does not result in a happy childhood.
• Eating unlimited amounts of candy and processed foods does not result in a happy childhood.

Know what I am betting my money on? Spending time with my kid and responding to his needs as the develop. Living in a place that has access to lots of friends and activities and really neat places that we can visit at the drop of a hat...often for free! Know how many dinosaurs I saw when I was a a kid? Probably zero! We did have the Franklin Institute and the Please Touch museum, which were very cool, but I only got to visit these places on class trips anyway.

Know what's cool about Christmas trees? The lights! We have lights. We even have a tree this year. It's turquoise. It serves it's purpose and Harry loves it. He also loves his lights and the presents scattered throughout the house, as well as the paper chains and gingerbread house that we all made together. Kevin had to do most of the building this year, however. I had a pretty miserable attempt last year. In my defense, it was my first attempt. I NEVER MADE ONE WHEN I WAS A KID!!! I WAS DEPRIVED I GUESS!!!!

I was not deprived of toys, however. Yes, Kevin, I had a Green Machine, and every thing else under the sun. It was nice to get everything you dreamed of...until you don't, because there's a time when you won't, and then it's not so much fun. It's also not fun to hear that you are a spoiled brat all of the time, especially when you have nothing to do with the process it takes to become one.

Know what makes kids happy? Playing with other kids in a stimulating environment. Being independent and learning from teachers who are skilled at their job. Mommies and Daddies who are happy to see you and spend time with you. Not being dragged on errands you don't want to go on. A SMOKE FREE ENVIRONMENT!

Know what makes kids happy? Knowing that they can do whatever it is they want to do without stigma. Boys can cook and play with dolls. Girls can get dirty and play with trucks. Everyone is happy without putting other people down.

Sleep and good food make kids happy. Staying up all night and eating junk food makes them cranky.

And so, that is my vent session for today. Doing things the way they have always been done doesn't mean that's the best way to do them! There's a quote in there somewhere, but I cannot remember it at the moment.

But, I will also leave you with some more advice below...and maybe explain a little about why it is important that we eat dinner together every night, rather than setting Harry up with a TV tray in the living room:

The Benefits of Eating Together
The Family Who Eats Together Stays Together -- By Becky Hand, Licensed & Registered Dietitian

"Come and get it!"
It may be dinnertime, but when was the last time your family sat down and enjoyed dinner together? With music lessons, ball practice, play rehearsal, and work schedules, it can be tough. Rounding up the troop for an evening meal can be almost impossible! However, research is beginning to show that eating as a family has great benefits for your children and teenagers. Here are 8 more reasons why you should try to sit down together 5-6 times a week, whether for breakfast, lunch or dinner.

Reason #1: Communication and Well-Being
Conversations during the meal provide opportunities for the family to bond, plan, connect, and learn from one another. It’s a chance to share information and news of the day, as well as give extra attention to your children and teens. Family meals foster warmth, security and love, as well as feelings of belonging. It can be a unifying experience for all.

Reason #2: Model Manners (and more)
Family mealtime is the perfect opportunity to display appropriate table manners, meal etiquette, and social skills. Keep the mood light, relaxed, and loving. Try not to instruct or criticize—lead by example.

Reason # 3: Expand Their World…One Food at a Time
Encourage your children to try new foods, without forcing, coercing, or bribing. Introduce a new food along with some of the stand-by favorites. Remember that it can take 8-10 exposures to a new food before it is accepted, so be patient. Trying a new food is like starting a new hobby. It expands your child’s knowledge, experience, and skill.
Include foods from other cultures and countries.
Select a new vegetable from a local farmer’s market.
Have your child select a new recipe from a cookbook, web site, newspaper, magazine or check out the recipes on BabyFit.

Reason #4: Nourish
Meals prepared and eaten at home are usually more nutritious and healthy. They contain more fruits, vegetables, and dairy products along with additional nutrients such as fiber, calcium, vitamins A and C, and folate. Home cooked meals are usually not fried or highly salted, plus soda and sweetened beverage consumption is usually lower at the dinner table.

Reason #5: Become Self-Sufficient
Children today are missing out on the importance of knowing how to plan and prepare meals. Basic cooking, baking, and food preparation are necessities for being self-sufficient. Involve your family in menu planning, grocery shopping, and food preparation. Preschoolers can tear lettuce, cut bananas, and set the table. Older children can pour milk, peel vegetables, and mix batter. Teenagers can dice, chop, bake, and grill. Working as a team puts the meal on the table faster, as well as makes everyone more responsible and accepting of the outcome. Improved eating habits come with "ownership" of a meal.

Reason #6: Prevent Destructive Behaviors
Research shows that frequent family dinners (five or more a week), are associated with lower rates of smoking, drinking, and illegal drug use in pre-teens and teenagers when compared to families that eat together two or fewer times per week. Even as older children’s schedules get more complicated, it is important to make an effort to eat meals together. Scheduling is a must.

Reason #7: Improve Grades
Children do better in school when they eat more meals with their parents and family. Teenagers who eat dinner four or more times per week with their families have higher academic performance compared with teenagers who eat with their families two or fewer times per week.

Reason # 8: Save Money
Meals purchased away from home cost two to four times more than meals prepared at home. At present time the restaurant industry’s share of the total food dollar is more than 46%. Due to scheduling, commitments, and activities, families eat out several times each week. It is time to bring the "family" back to the dinner table. Sharing dinner together gives everyone a sense of identity. It can help ease day-to-day conflicts, as well as establish traditions and memories that can last a lifetime.

Service with a smile....

For some time Harry will play store/restaurant/kitchen and ask "What do you want today?"
Now, he follows it up with a smile and "I hope you enjoy it!"

Made Man

To reference Donnie Brasco, I seem to have made the crossover from being a friend of Harry's, to a friend of Our's (the Abracadabra boys). I think I must've gotten made.

When I arrived today to pick up Harry, he was playing at the other end of the room with a few other kids, making a huge well-balanced pile of plastic bears on a wooden toy flatbed truck. While I watched I was not only greeted by at least half of the class, but actually got a huge hug from one of Harry's buddies, and was immediately ingratiated into a game by 2 others.

Eventually Harry spotted me, and we cleaned up and headed home. During dinner, I brought up the big hug from his pal. Harry said "he thinks you're his daddy."

Wasn't quite sure what to make of that, but after further discussion, Harry seemed to be fine with it, and everything was very matter-of-fact. So much so that it seemed very reasonable, if not expected, that at some point that Harry would lend me out in much the same way as he would a toy car.

Speaking of matter-of-fact, I had a very candid conversation with one of my close friends at work yesterday, about the things kids say/do/talk about these days, as opposed to when we were younger. His kids are much older ('tweens), but it all started with the discussion from Harry's party last weekend about gun play, and all of the parents wondering where it was coming from, everyone assuming it was from someone else's kid, as we all seem to downplay as MUCH as possible (much credit to the Abra staff for doing so as well).

My friend noted that he's lately been floored by the things his son in particular, not only discusses freely, but has given serious consideration to. Extrapolating the conversations he's having now with his 14-year-old, to when Harry's 14. Somehow I imagine that things will continue to come faster and sooner, and boys will still be boys. I can only hope that Harry's head stays on target like his sons', and that his wits are as sensible.

So far so good.

Tolerance.org

Here's a great link Kevin had up on the computer.

Wizard Cookies

Today was cookie decorating day at Kate's. We all suspected her parents were exceedingly brave, but it really wasn't that messy. The kids started out with sheets of pre-shaped dough. I think only Kate, Harry and Rafe decorated these. I was very proud of Harry's orderly obsession. Later, all of the kids iced baked gingerbread cookies. They got to use their own knives in jars of colored icing. They were all very serious. And they were all pretty clean after. Kate's older sister and her friend (15-ish) were helpers, and they were amazing. Everyone got to take some cookies home, even.
Kevin also agreed that we seem to be the youngest parents by far. It's crazy, since we're not all that young. The age-factor may be why we all seem to be cut from the same overly-attentive mold. And speaking of that same mold, we are all at a loss as to why the kids all try to pretend they carry guns, whether it is legos or just their fingers. Where do they get this???? I thought it was from the more "active" kids, but those parents seem to be even more concerned.
Funniest part of the event, we were probably the second people there, and Harry got super shy when he went in. Each and every kid that followed, particularly the boys, all had the very same reaction. M. even had to go back outside for a while. A. cried. And those two are the "tough guys"! Before you knew it, t hough, they were all racing through the house and playing together nicely.
It was nice for us to get to know some of the parents, as well. I had not realized there are a few others that are also new to Abra. Everyone is very friendly and we seem to share common values. I guess that is part of what happens when you hang out in your own neighborhood for a change! It's so strange to leave for a party 5 minutes before we have to be there!
Another interesting fact: Kate's mom is due February 27. My official due date is February 29. Kate's mom seems less miserable than me.
Tomorrow is Abra's Christmas play. We have heard it is non-religious, but also that last year there was a Mary and a Joseph. Hmmm. Harry is a tree. They go "Swish. Swish."

You Better Watch Out!

Apparently, Santa is coming to town. Harry filled us in. Santa comes when you are asleep. He has keys to every house. Now, the question is, does Santa leave A present, or presentS?
For years we have been trying to avoid the standard materialism of the season, but I at least expected that the tides might change. My goal is to still avoid Harry turning into one of those bratty little bastards that is more interested in the next best thing than in the people who come to see him. We never force him to open more and more gifts. He is allowed to enjoy one thing at a time, as well as the people around him.
We've also been concerned that Harry would not be happy about a large red-suited man with a beard sneaking into his house at night. He still asks about the abilities of certain foxes to get into our yard, and was brought to tears by the idea of The Great Pumpkin. He seems okay with a guy bringing treats though. Come to think of it, we may have to have a talk about that!
In the meantime, he wants Santa to bring him a snowboard. He goes back and forth over whether Santa will bring it hear or just leave it with PopPop Oscar. Either way, he's not getting one. It doesn't snow here! And we are not going to the mountains this year! I did get him a Monkey balance board. I plan to tell him it's an indoor practice snowboard. And I will let Santa steal my thunder and give it to him.

Something I found in my notes....

Remember when Harry was home "sick" about a month ago?
Well, he wasn't in the mood to nap, and had a bit of a meltdown.
From the other side of the door, I took notes.

I Want Someone to Read Me TOY. STORY.
I want my grandmom!
I don't want to go anywhere!
I want to stay home!
I'm not going to kindergarten.
GRANDMOM! Grandmom, grandmom.

What Harry is unaware of is that I worked at the state mental hospital.
That's probably why I took notes, otherwise I would not have heard him at all.

Other than attempting to bite me through most of teh Justin Roberts concert Saturday (no nap), he's been mostly good ever since.

H^rr!s-n

Miss Natalie stopped me yesterday to show me a crumpled up piece f paper that Harry tried to throw away. On it, very clearly, was a heading that included a hat (Harry's symbol at school) and the name Harrison. The H and the two r's were especially clear. Go Harry!
He can also spell his name, thanks to our "H-A-Double R-I-S-O-N spells Harrison!" song.
Oh, and he can find Florida, where Mickey lives, on a map.

With a gleam in his eye...

We were at the table enjoying a meal together this weekend when the conversation turned to doctors. I told Harry that I was a doctor, not out of delusions of grandeur, but because, one, he doesn't like doctors much and, two, because being a doctor is closer to my job than being a pilot, which I think is what he suspected I was until recently. I wanted to see what his reaction would be. Rather than disdain, or a quizzical "Are you teasing me?" his response was "Noooo. You're Mommy!" with a big smile on his face.

Later this weekend, I think I was putting his shoes on, when I asked him why Kevin couldn't do the task at hand, or similar tasks. "Because you're Mommy."

Capital M, in a shield across my chest. With a cape.