round & round & round we go...

So Harry was a bit of a terror again this weekend, but in his defense, things were a bit off.

This weekend was supposed to see the arrival of the 2 Meghan's, an evening at the Zoo, QT with Magoo as a precursor to next weekend's sojourn North, pasta party with pals, finishing up with a day at the races for the MCM.

Meghan 2 apparently decided a while back she wasn't going to run, but it wasn't a deal breaker to keep her from visiting DC. She had still planned to cheer on and visit. But apparently Meghan 1 caught some kind of nasty stomach bug early in the week, that at last check, still has her reeling.

So the dominoes began to fall.

Kim quickly reallocated the extra tix for Boo @ the Zoo to one of Harry's old chums from daycare. We were all quite soggy by the end of the night (I swear the rain became progressively harder as the night went on), but a good time was had by all. A late night, as Harry still wanted a show, dinner, tub and a book after getting home, even though it was almost 9.

The stuffy head he'd been accumulating over the week probably wasn't helped much by the rainy excursion, so he was up about every 30-45 minutes, and I eventually gave up and slept on his floor.

Saturday, Magoo stayed home and concentrated on how much the recent rains were going to dampen his picks at Monmouth Park, from the comfort of his own home. Apparently while I was preparing for the Pasta Party, I missed the final race of the day, and the fact that George Washington was put down on the track.

Speaking of the Pasta Party, it was the pre-race carb load for the Meghans' that wasn't. We kept the invitation open to those locals who were still planning to come, but in the end, Mr. Paul and his new puppy Jack were the only ones who made it. Great to see them, and Bailey had a guest of her own to entertain, but another late night for the H man, with not a lot going for him -- his pal Emma's absence didn't help his mood at all, even after a marathon of his own getting in a 3+ hour nap.

So with no race to speed off to early this morning, we took it easy, Harry actually slept in until about 8, and we headed off for a muffin or 2 from Pannera. From there. we met up with another daycare pal for the delray Halloween dog & kids parade.

Harry's done very well this year actually putting a costume on, much less getting into character. Last year was nothing close. This year, it was all he could talk about... until we got there just a bit too early, and ended up having to wait around. Mind you, a beautiful day with plenty of sunshine heading our way, but it started right around when naptime should have been.

Once we got to parading, he was a bit better off. He did his best to help keep Bailey in line, helped her look cute, and then we hit the hot dog & apples line at the end. It provided just enough energy for everyone to head over to one of the less-crowded playgrounds for a few slides before heading home.

Just as we were ready to give up on meeting up with his friends, they showed up out of the crowd, and we got to watch the boys climb the chain link fence on their own (not sure where they picked that up, but I'm a bit concerned). Of course, just as Harry has been quick to ask others for Popsicles, today he (very politely I might add) asked Hunter's mom if they could get ice cream. Seemed like a good idea, so off we headed to the local custard shop.

One Chocolate cone with rainbow sprinkles and quality romp in the bus stop gardening later, we headed home for dinner. After a bit of a battle of trying to get him to eat the same meal as us, Harry was finally in bed (and fast asleep) at a reasonable hour.

Back to school tomorrow, and another busy week.

Birthday party Tuesday, School Halloween party & trick-or-treating Wednesday, and up to Magoo's for next weekend on Friday.

He still continues to ask about his sister, and although we spent a lot of planned time with old friends this weekend, he also bumped into at least 3 new pals from school just today. I was quite impressed with myself that one of the dad's recognized me for my kid. Having lived in delray for a while, we used to always get recognized for being Bailey's... not today.

On a completely unrelated note, I also came to the realization recently, that I have lived in the DC metro area longer than I've lived in any other area...

Oh, and if you have the opportunity, ask Harry where he was born...

In all seriousness...

I gave my kid a bath last night in chin deep water and bubbles to his chin. Apparently the bubbles were a 'tend beard like knights have. Knights have 'tend beards, especially when they joust. To complete the ensemble, Harry wore a red plastic IKEA colander on his head, complete with handle. It was his helmet. This colander is probably our most used "toy". It was less than $5, and probably only $1 but I don't remember. He used bubble wands as jousting sticks to collect rings like they do at the Renaissance Festival. The tub was his horse.

Rule #1: Remain Calm

The author of Scream Free Parenting claims the best thing you can do during a tantrum is to remain absolutely calm. This is what I've been doing and I have been wondering if it is my best option. Apparently it is. Cool.

Speechless

"TJ's Mommy, can I have a popsicle?"
A tiny hand goes over my mouth. "No talking!"

We keep getting Boo'd!!!

It's a Hallmark thing. I am positive they started it. You buy two gift bags that come with an explanation of what getting Boo'd is, then you fill up the bags and leave them on the doorsteps of two different neighbors. I am running out of kids to Boo! I ended up using my last bag for Anita next door. She's an empty nester and misses having kids around, so I picked up a nice pumpkin spice candle and chocolate pretzels and more gourmet type things. The rest of the kids got Halloween yoyo's, Harry Potter jellybeans, etc. It's pretty fun, actually, but I really am running out of kids!

From a Good WItch, at Goodreads.com

This information was volunteered to me after I gave a book review stating I needed more info on how to raise my Taurus child. I just provided some birth dates:

(I am):
SUN: Capricorn, born close to the cusp with Sagittarius (so you have some of those qualities as well) ***A character in a Janet Evanovitch book with a similar sign said this made him a "sensitive asshole."
DAY: Gemini
MOON: Sagittarius

(My) child:
SUN: Taurus, born close to the cusp with Aries
DAY: Aquarius
MOON: my moon chart doesn't go up that far, so I don't know his moon. Do you? It changes every 48 hours or so.

Okay, you are a Capricorn, which means you are very organized, not personable, and have little patience with people. But you are born close to the cusp with Sagittarius, and you have a Sagittarian Moon. This makes you very personable, talkative, easily scattered, lover of physical activity like dance/sports/etc., and incredibly disorganized. Gemini is talkative, scattered, disorganized beyond belief. So you have a great conflict going on within you. The organized, not very talkative Capricorn is very irritated with the disorganized, chatty Gemini/Sag part of you.

I only have your son's Sun and Day because my Moon chart doesn't go up into 2004, but that is enough to see the conflicts you are having with him. He is incredibly organized, intelligent, and STUBBORN. Your Gemini/Sag tendencies, while very likeable, drive him NUTS, even at this early age. He is a Taurus born close to the cusp with Aries. Aries is very intelligent, positive, organized, a trail-blazer. You never have to worry about an Aries child. They will take care of themselves and do a very good job of it. Fall down, and they get right back up to try again with a smile on their faces. But because they are born leaders, they only listen to that inner Aries tune. Taurus is slow and patient, a good buffer for the Aries who moves fast and is impatient. However Taurus is STUBBORN with all caps (grin). Can't move them no matter what. Mix that with Aries, and he is a force to be reckoned with!

He is born on the day of Aquarius, making him very intelligent, incredibly organized, a fast talker/walker/thinker. I love Aquarians...they are so efficient! But because of this they barely notice other people, meaning they find few people they deem worthy to talk to. I have known Aquarian children who wouldn't say a single word to anyone for two years. It isn't that they have a problem. They just don't feel like talking.

Mix this with Taurus and Aries and you have an even greater force to be reckoned with in this child. He is organized, super intelligent, and will follow his own voice no matter what anyone else tells him (if he even acknowledges others). This kid is a born leader and destined to greatness. But this is going to drive your Capricorn nuts. His sign mix just irritates a Capricorn to no end. Capricorn craves control. Aries/Taurus/Aquarius KNOWS he has the control and just smiles about it. Plus, he can sense the great conflict within you, and knows he has more astrological control than you ever will...your disorganized/scattered tendencies are just too great. And he knows it. One day (sooner than you think) he will be running intellectual and organizational circles around you, and you'll never catch up. And he knows this. Wow, what a kid!

So my first advice is don't worry about this kid. He is going to be just fine. He knows where he is going in life, and doesn't feel the need to let anyone else in on that knowledge. To train him as a parent you will have to find a way to make him think your suggestions are his ideas, not yours. NEVER tell him outright what to do. You'll come up against a stubborn wall that won't budge. I'm sure you already know that. Instead become the one who feeds his intelligence. Give him stimulating books and games...he will master them quickly. He will work more easily with you if you become his partner in life rather than his teacher. Thing is by becoming his partner you will be his teacher (but he doesn't have to know that *grin*). This way you will become someone he will respect, which is the most important thing to him. He may never feel you are his intellectual equal, but he will respect you and that will be just as important to him. Otherwise, he will eventually cut you out of his life by choosing not to tell you anything. I can see this happening as early as the first grade in school.

How does this sound? Any questions or specific problems you are encountering with him you would like to ask me about?

Hope this helps! Also, do you know his Moon from the chart that was already done on him?

I then commented that Mr/ Taurus and his father, the Libra, often butt heads like rams. DOB #3 was provided:

What a hoot! Here's your husband...

SUN: Libra
DAY: Gemini
MOON: Virgo

You two are a good match, but not in the way you might think (grin). This is an incredibly disorganized mix for your husband. Bless his heart! So together you are the disorganized couple with a super organized son. Ha!

Libra is the sign of beauty, meaning he is either very good-looking or he is in a "beautification" business (home decor, something to do with physical beautifcation, interior design, floor covering, art, etc.). Libra is also called the NES sign (a combination of yes and no), because they can't make a decision to save their lives! These are the people who go to a restaurant and send the server back a zillion times and end up ordering the thing they always order (maddening!)

They are also terminally disorganized, scattered, and avoid confrontation at all costs. He is born on the day of Gemini, so you know that that means...chatty, scattered, disoragnized.

His moon is Virgo...Yikes! This is where all the head-butting with your son comes in. Aries and Virgo are an oil and water mix...explosive! Virgo is the manipulator of the zodiac. But it is usually emotional manipulation (complete with hysterical fits). Their nerve-endings stick out way more than everyone else, so EVERYONE bothers them. And they never forget all the "supposed" wrongs against them. Moody people for sure. As well as disorganzed and messy. Virgos act nice up front, but are plotting all the time how they are going to get you to do what they want. No way your husband can let your son do his own thing. Kind of like your husband wants your son to do everything his way...as soon as his disorganized self figures out what that is. All the time your son can sense this and loses patience with it. What a pair they are!

Unless your husband can control his Virgo and all that manipulation, he will lose touch with your son year after year until they are not very close at all. Best thing he can do is let your son do his own thing (yeah, right *grin*) and cut out all the hissy fits in your son's presence. That overboard emotion will make your son lose respect for your husband faster than anything. Your son sees it as a total waste of time, and just can't understand it.

Good luck with that. You have your hands full for sure! :)

Since I am forever telling Kevin that his Qi is on the surface, I am sure he will be very offended by this. That is, if he can make a decision one way or another. Hee Hee!!! :-) At least he's beautiful.

WHat's Harry Up To These Days?

• Being " a grown up"
• Taping artwork to the refrigerator
• Standing on a chair to get his own water from said fridge
• Picking out the guitar parts of songs on the radio (so far as I can tell, he is correct)
• Requesting 7:00 PM bedtimes
• Sharing his PB&J at lunchtime
• Watching Toy Story
• Watching Toy Story 2
• Reading Toy Story
• Planning to be Spiderman for Halloween
• Learning how to use this sewing board game (so he can sew his own hockey pads later)
• Dipping things in his soy milk/yogurt drink/water/empty glass
• Sticking Halloween stickers from Aunt Meghan all over his Cars tackle box (they match and look pretty cool!)
• Telling a friend at school "you're not fun" when sand was thrown, instead of throwing sand back
• Overall being a pretty good kid!
  

Harry wore his new Spiderman shoes to school today.

Oh, the drama!

I don't have a need for it. Drama. Maybe it is because I am a naturally anxious person. I have worked hard to relax and not freak out over things.There are certain people in my life that like to play it up, however. Someone's car breaks down and the lives of 12 others stand still. It's all they can talk about, whereas others have noted that for me, I make an 8 hour drive to Ohio sound like I'm going to 7-11. I hope I don't downplay everything, but some things just aren't a big deal.
I was reading the Costco magazine on Friday while Harry entertained his 10 year old friend for dinner. Yes, Harry invited Nicholas over, and the kid showed up. They even came up with their own desert. Didn't want to interfere, so Kev and I hung out in the front room. Anyway, we love Costco and the magazine is not bad either. So, I was reading an article by Wally "Famous" Amos. If I recall correctly, Wally lost his whole Famous Amos business, or something like that. He has since founded Wally's Muffin Company. He had this to say:

Times of adversity catch up with all of us regardless of our stature or position in life. My experiences have taught me that it's not what happens to you that matters, it's how you respond. Adversity has become my best teacher.

Well said!

MCM

Mommy: Harry, Aunt Meghan is going to be running the Marine Corps Marathon again when she comes to visit. Will you cheer for her?
Harry: YEAH! And I will tell her to keep her head up!

That's what you do when you run, you keep your head up so you don't crash into other little boys and girls.
At least he's paying attention!
Harry then got Meghan and Ian's wedding notecard off of his bulletin board and set it up on his desk for when she comes to visit.

Guess who...

When I picked Harry up at school teh other day, there was a big kid there...about 8-11. 30 kids on the playground, guess who was talking the kid's ear off?

Pet Peeves

Know what bugs me even more than the Mommy Wars? The annoying, desperate sounding, pro-Mom stuff. I find it alienating to both men as well as to women who have equal partners. Here's a line from The Sleep Lady's newsletter "Please join me in making the statement that moms are the pulse of the family, the community and the economy." I will give them "the economy" but not the family or the community. I see plenty of dads around town pushing both strollers and joggers. It's the guys I know that do the cooking. I run into more dads at preschool than moms.
Sure, I know dads that go to the pool by themselves while their stay at home wife takes the kids to the movies on a Saturday, but I find that that is the exception, rather than the rule. Maybe that is just DC, but if that is the case, that is why we are not moving.
I never feel burdened by parenting, or by my job for that matter. I credit the healthy balance we have for that, both the flexibility I have with my career and the wonderful father and husband that Kevin is and the fact that we work as a team.

No Nightmares! Harry is Sleeping!

What a difference a day makes. The monster went away and on Monday morning, Columbus Day, I was left with a rational little boy. This little boy went willingly to teh doctors' and was all smiles, even upon arrival. The smile didn't even fade when I remembered he should probably have a flu shot. I had promised no shots. We were just going to talk to the doctor, get nose and ears checked...I explained my mistake and he understood.
Prior to the shot, Harry was given a clean bill of health. ears, nose and throat looked perfect. He's gained about a pound since April. The nurses loved his golden highlights. The nasal voice is because he has a little tiny nose. I was told I did as well, and I also sound nasally. Other than being told I can't sing, I've made it this far without too many problems. Harry will too.
Then teh shot. He climbed on the table and I was told to lay him down. 10 seconds of tears and panic when I had to hold him down. By then she was done. "That hurt my leg!" Harry scolded angrily. Then he saw the evacuation map on the wall and was telling everyone they had that at school, too. The silly nurse actually went back to the sticker box 3 times to get him the perfect fire engine sticker. He got a second bull dozer sticker as we were leaving, and all was well.
Harry was helpful at CVS, carefully pushing the shopping cart. He picked out one small toy that entertained him throughout the day as I got work done. He did watch the Cars movie and then we got lunch. I wanted Panera but was vetoed for Generous George's. Panera gets crowded with Catholic school kids at lunch anyway, so I agreed to pizza. Harry was disappointed Daddy wasn't home for lunch and wanted to wait, but I was starving, and not in a cooking mood.
Harry got to pick his own table by the window at lunch. He ordered his food. We played "WHat do you see" with him asking me lots of questions. I learned everyone's symbol at Abracadabra...Harry is a hat, Miles is a mountain, Angus is an ant, Benjamin is a boat...
Post lunch, no nap, but quiet play in his room. I actually had a very productive workday!
Kevin took Harry to play when he got home. Nicholas stopped by to say hi. More Daddy play after dinner, then tub. Then "I want to sleep upstairs...there's nightmares in my closet."
We made a sign at Kevin's suggestion: No Nightmares! Harry is Sleeping!
First words out of Harry's mouth when I went to wake him today were that there were no nightmares! "The sign worked! Where did they go?" And so, the nightmares had to get a hotel room.

Worst Weekend Ev-ah

This one certailny topped any prior. To call Harry a emotional roller-coaster this weekend would certainly be an understatement.

We had more foot-stomping and items thrown (including both open- and closed-fists), that you usually see on the mid-day talk shows about spastic kids.

For the first time that I can remember, Harry actually didn't make it to Gym class, which isn't to say that we didn't go to gym class. In fact, Pop-pop even came down to visit, packed himself into the backseat of the Forrester (at Harry's explicit direction of course), and traipsed along after sitting in the car himself for 3 hours.

Harry was great until it was actually time to go in. For those of you who haven't been following along, Harry's current class is kids-only. Parents and posse's hang in the lobby behind the platen glass. Usually Harry loves showing off, leading the class, instructing the teachers on how to run the stations, etc. But this time, he adamantly refused to go in without Mommy... tears began to flow, and I could feel the foot-stomping coming.

Most interesting was to overhear another boy's visiting grandparent (?) comment on the poor boy crying in the corner clinging to his mother, and then to hear his father note how odd it was, that that particular boy was never the one in the corner...

So rather than put on a show for everyone, we headed back home... and the antics continued.

We decided that we'd put Pop-pop's truck to use, and headed to Lowe's for some home improvement supplies. We finished up there after a less-than-helpful bunch made sure to keep us there for at least 30 minutes longer than we needed to, and we headed back home, while Pop-pop made a quick stop at the Tobacco Barn for supplies. Nothing better than getting a call from him about a 1/4 mile from home that he'd been rear-ended at a light, hitting him into another car.

Dropped Kim & Harry off at home for a nap (you pick who needed one more), and back to the scene. Plenty of drama later, and at least he was able to drive away.

A nice dinner, and Harry headed off to bed, and Pop-pop back north.

So we tried again this morning. Harry helped make a pancake breakfast, actually ate his, and started off pretty well. Then the foot-stomping began. He made sure that everything he wanted was expressed loudly and repeatedly, sans please or thank you, and that he changed his mind just before either of us started to move.

Tricycle into the garden, bike helmet out the door and down the patio steps, and a few swings later, Harry finally went down for a nap. Somehow, he actually slept through the lawn mower under his window, and a brief visit by the Brockways (greeted by Bailey's barking of course). Somehow, he convinced Kim to keep her word about going to get ice cream afterwards.

Dinner was a mess again, and ended as it usually does lately, with Harry in his room crying while we finish up.

Hoping things go better tomorrow, he's home with Kim for Columbus Day. I have a feeling the TV ban is going to be lifted, as we're back in de-sensitize mode. Apparently "There's a Nighmare in my Closet" is a new one on the docket at school, and Harry wants nothing more around bedtime, than to sleep upstairs with us. Best we can some up with so far is repeated screenings of Disney/PIXAR Monsters Inc. We'll see how that goes, and hopefully Kim makes it through the day, job intact, tomorrow.

3-5!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KEVIN!!!

Nosey

Harry's French speaking preschool teacher is concerned he sounds too nasally, so I need to take him to the doctor Monday to find out what's up. Probably small nasal passages like me. But I'm on it. No way am I subjecting him to surgery or anything, but I'm getting it checked. However, Jerry Seinfeld...gotta admit, he's pretty nasally...

People are people

After 2 years of scribbles and lines, a few months ago Harry started bringing home pictures of himself and his family. They are cute little circles or squares with eyes, nose, mouth...sometimes hair, and lines for arms and legs, sometimes with shoes. I have been wondering what his progress was like, then yesterday I noticed a drawing made by his friend Angus at Abracadabra. Same person! And as I passed through the 4-year-old room (Genies) I noticed even they drew the same people! Neat! I love to follow the developmental process. It's fascinating for me. Little lab rats, I like to call them.
Speaking of Genies, as previously mentioned, Harry is a Wizard, the 2 year olds are Munchkins. It's kind of fun and a little bit weird to use the terms in sentences.
K: Is Henry a Wizard?
H: No, he's a Genie.

Snack Food

Had to run to MOM's today for grapes and blueberries. Harry has been enjoying grapes as an afterschool snack. I am happy to encourage it. Since he doesn't eat much at mealtime, we are supposed to load him up with healthy junk the rest of the time. He has started eating baby carrots with dinner. 1 or 2. And he ate fish sticks and cantaloupe one day at school last week. Yesterday he had some apples with his brown bag PB & J. I find myself slowly walking up each and every aisle at the food stores, willing to buy whatever Mickey shaped burger or dinosaur shaped nuggets I see. Even that doesn't work most of the time. Oh well. He continues to be pretty healthy (KNOCK. ON. WOOD.). Something must be working.